eHarmony

We just got back from a many-thousand mile trip (99 bottles of milk on the wall. 99 bottles of milk… Someone get me a bottle of beer because now I understand why that guy wrote this song.)

Anyway, we got home, flipped on the TV and saw Isabella’s eHarmony commercial.

Blink and you'll miss her.  Because you'll fall asleep listening to the eHarmony guy.

Blink and you’ll miss her. Because you’ll fall asleep listening to the eHarmony guy

Iz: Daddy, I don’t want to just be in commercials. I want to be in Real movies.

Me: Ok, then let’s start by cleaning up your room.

Iz: Um… Actually… I’m Ok with commercials.

Cows

On the road from Atlanta to Baltimore, the girls (8 and 11) are engaged in a classic “You’re on My Side” battle. Tempers run high. Lots of screaming. Everyone is yelling. Mommy and Daddy. Yelling. At 75 MPH.

Mommy (trying to diffuse the situation): Look! There are cows! Look! … Mooo!

Julianna (things get quiet… the 11-year-old suddenly gets pensive, wistful…): Hello, cow. Too bad you are so delicious. Taste you soon.

Then…

Isabella (8): She’s looking at a cow on my side! That’s MY cow!

Crap. 545 miles to go.

Car Pool Lane

On the way to gymnastics, Isabella (she’s 8) and I are in the car pool lane.

Iz: Daddy?

Me: Yes, dear?

Iz: When you are driving with a baby in a car seat in the back seat, are you allowed to use the car pool lane?

Me: Yes, Sweetie. Two people. Doesn’t matter how old they are.

Iz: Really?

Me: Yes. And, that’s about the only advantage to having a child. You can use the car pool lane.

Pause. Pause.

Iz: Heeeeeyyy!