So, our van has a busted tire. Chunks out of the sidewall. Lynn says I must have hit something. Other than that damn squirrel, I think “no.” Nothing that would cause that much damage. I’d remember that. But, I didn’t drive the van last Saturday night. I wonder who did. (Dun-dun-DUUNN!)
Fingers are pointed. Puzzled looks are shared. Conspiracy theories are hatched. Made-in-Hollywood Headlines are generated. The passive voice is used. (That’s for my English-major friends…)
But, honestly… It doesn’t matter. The tire is busted.
I take it to the Costco for replacement. Road hazard, they tell me. Under warranty. They pro-rate me 50% on the 3 year old tire. I am Ok with that.
How long? Umm. About an hour, hour and 15.
Surely, there’s a nice, neighborly breakfast place nearby. Let me walk down Victory Blvd in beautiful Burbank, CA. Yeah, no. Umm… No place to eat. Nothing but apartments.
Let’s me swing down to Burbank Blvd. “Hair’s Where You Wanna Be!” Or, something. “Otto’s Auto Autopia.” Tongue Twister. Also, redundant. No food. No dice.
So, I U-turn it, and head back to the only land of breakfast civilization that I can find.
McDonalds. Big Breakfast. With the greasy hash browns. WiFi. It’s a small place. I sit near the bathrooms. Hell, the whole place is near the bathrooms. I’m Lovin’ It.
I cross the crazy-multi-intersection back to Costco. I see that the van is still in the bay. So, I kill time by actually, you know, shopping in Costco. (Hint, the doors open early Post-Thanksgiving. Most people are lined up for returns…)
I pick up some bananas, pigs-in-a-blanket. Bottle of egg nog. A couple of those. Chips.
I pay the lady, get the exit-door guy to mark my receipt, then I see my van pull out of the bay. I show the dude my paper work, and I get in and drive away.
But, I’m left wondering… Surely, there’s got to be some decent breakfast place in the neighborhood. Near the 5. Victory and Burbank. Near the Costco. I come by all the time, just not usually in the morning with time to kill. This was my chance. And, now… I’m afraid I will never know.
Where do the people eat?
(And, now the Burbank Chamber of Commerce will flood me with freebies… Let’s see. Let’s hope.)