It’s my most favorite time of day. Snuggling up at bedtime. (Because, Good God, Stop Screaming!)

Tonight, I’m with Julianna (she’s 8).

J: Dadda, sing me a lullaby. But, a good one. Something different. Not Twinkle, Twinkle.

Me: Ok.

I quickly search my brain, and I settle on the comfort food of my youth: The Beatles.

But, as anyone who has ever heard me sing will tell you, I can’t carry a tune to save my life. Doesn’t matter how many damn music degrees I have, or the years of experience… I just can’t sing.

I begin:

(F Major) Yesterday.
(D Major) All my troubles seemed so far away.
There’s a (E-flat) shadow hanging over me.
(G Major) Oh, I believe (A-flat) in Yester (G) day.

Suddenly (C-minor/major), I’m not half the man (borrowed Five of Five) I used to be.
(D-flat 11, Major 7th) There’s a shadow (going twelve-tone here) hanging over me.

Oh, I believe (back to F Major) in Yesterday. (Nailed it.)


Why she (abstract tone cluster) had to go,
I don’t know,
(Oh crap! Computers! Effing Computers) She wouldn’t say.
Why she (Total crap! Pitch Correction! Who am I? Beyonce?) had to go,
I don’t know. (Total stochasticism. Where the Hell is Xenakis?)
She wouldn’t say. (D-minor. Oh, Zimmer.)

I said (A-447, or similar) something’s wrong (yeah, like your singing),
Now I long, for (the end of my singing) for (wait for it…)
Yes- (D Major) ter- (C-sharp-minor) day (A major) – ay (C minor) – ay (B-flat) – ay.

F-Major. Yeah… Nailed it.


Julianna is totally asleep. So, you know, it’s not the voice you have. It’s that you sing. Don’t be shy. Kids love music. No matter how crummy it is.

Keep singing.