True story, just today:

Iz: Daddy, what is a “bulge?”

Me: It’s like a bump in something. Usually, its bigger than just a bump. Like my belly. My belly is a big bump. A bulge.

Iz: But, You’re just fat.

But, what’s the difference between “Speed” and “Speeding?”

Me: Uhh. Why?

Iz: Because, we just passed a police motorcycle.

Me: Crap!

Iz: Daddy, what is crap? Speed?

Me: Shit!

Iz: Daddy, what’s that? Speeding?