When you turn 50, you’re supposed to visit the doctor.
Yeah, I don’t want that.
Doctor: Let’s just make sure everything is Ok. And, while we’re at it…
Me: I already don’t like where this conversation is going, and now you want to add a parenthetical clause?
Doc: Let’s talk about your diet. Exercise. Life style. Sleep. Blood pressure. We want to add years to your life.
Me: Yes, Doctor. But, you are adding years to the end of my life. If you want to add years, give me a couple more 1984s. Because, I totally would have asked that cute redhead cheerleader to the prom.