Listening to the weather report on the drive in to school this morning.
Guy on the radio: The Polar Vortex is going to continue to pummel the East Coast. Lows well-below Zero.
Me: Wow! That’s cold.
Julianna (She’s 9): Where does Grandma live?
Me: Well, where the Guy says. Where it’s cooooold.
J: So, it must be colder there than where Santa lives.
Me: Probably.
Isabella (she’s 7): Santa lives at the North Pole. Is it colder where Grandma lives than at the North Pole?
Me: I don’t know. Maybe.
J: So, Santa could move his whole Operation to where Grandma lives.
Me: Operation? He has an “Operation?”
J: Yeah, and he could start making toys there.
Me: Uh…. I suppose, Yeah.
Iz: But, he’d have to keep it secret. So maybe he’d find a factory somewhere.
J: An abandoned factory! Like in Scooby Doo!
Me: Uh…. Yeah, there are sadly a lot of empty factories in the coldest parts of the country.
J: One of them would be perfect for Santa!
Iz (the pragmatist): But… He would have to keep them clean on the inside, but still look dirty on the outside. So no one would notice.
J: Of course!
Me: That’s a wonderful idea girls, and… I’m sure Santa has thought of this.
Throwing cold water on the suggestion. (Boo me if you want!)
Me: But the reindeer need the cold. They need the North Pole. They have to live at the North Pole! And, HE CAN’T HAVE ANYONE AROUND.
J: I guess you’re right.
Iz: Uh-huh
Me (Wispering): I’m sending more jobs abroad.
J: What?
Me: Nothing. Not me.
[This is not too far from the actual conversation. I never encouraged anyone to Boo me. But, if you feel the need, have at it.]